Despite being freed of my housewifely burdens for four whole days this week, I don’t seem to be making my usual headway on that old chestnut, the “To Do List”. There are a couple of reasons for this:-
And that’s not all. The ironing mountain has expanded to become an entire range. My beloved is getting down to his last formal shirts and t-shirts. We’re talking items of clothing that probably haven’t seen the light of day for a year or two, which is possibly no bad thing. My terrace garden is looking decidedly sad. We really need to find plants that can withstand my wanton neglect. I’m thinking fake here!
My fridge-freezer has had a bit of a wobble. It’s stopped producing ice and, instead, the water just freezes thereby clogging up the entire mechanism. I’ve checked the mile high instruction booklet which seems to cover every small eventuality except this one. It may be time for a visit from the man from Gaggenau as the oven and hood lights also need replacing and these can only be fitted by, yes you’ve guessed, the man from Gaggenau. Of course, all the appliances are now outside of their 5-year warranty period.
Bob, my formerly faithful robotic floor sweeper, keeps hiding under the bed. He’s like a heat seeking missile. I set him off in the lounge and in no time at all he’s made his way through the dining room, along the corridor and into the bedroom where he makes a bee line for the bed. He then attempts to suck up the ties on the mattress which get twisted up in his mechanism and he conks out under the bed where I can’t reach him. I’ve tried pushing him out with a broom, but there’s no budging him. I do try to keep the door to the bedroom closed but as soon as I open it, quick as a flash, he’s in and up to no good.
I also need to put in a call to our IT man as both printers are printing sporadically. The one HP printer has always been the print equivalent of the supermarket trolley with the wonky wheel. Sometimes, it works impeccably and then, for no rhyme or reason, it refuses to perform various functions. Not all the time you understand, just from time to time. We’ve followed all the helpful instructions, re-booted, re-installed etc but it’s as if it has a mind of its own. Currently, it’s refusing to scan. The other printer, our heavy duty black and white one, which doesn’t scan, fax or copy, is generally used by my beloved. A man who, left to his own devices, could fell an entire Swedish rainforest in an afternoon’s print orgy. His rapidly failing eyesight means he simply has to print out everything; and, I do mean everything. Of course, he generally then forgets to pick them up the documents from the print tray before leaving for the airport! It’s gone on strike, it just won’t print at all.
To add to our woes, the HD service we receive from Orange over the internet isn’t working. This means a call to Orange. I’ve been stalling as I know I’ll have to do the rounds of various call centres before I haphazardly chance upon someone who can help. They do have an English speaking service but sadly it’s staffed by people whose English is infinitely worse than my French and I’ve found it’s easier to stick with the regular service. But this does mean I’ll have to deal with them as my beloved would rather have his molars extracted without anaesthetic than deal with Orange, other than face to face. And he’s tried that already.
My Twitter service on my Blackberry is working but well in arrears which means it’s a bit difficult to keep up with what’s happening and respond accordingly. The one I set up on Hootsuite for VeloVoices receives but now won’t send tweets and it takes so long to log into Tweet Deck that it keeps logging me out before I’ve gotten in. My only solace in the face of this overload of technical and mechanical insolence is to escape for a few hours of peace and quiet on the bike.